Nov 12, 2009
Knee-gah! and the crowning turd in the water pipe
Six weeks. SIX FUCKING WEEKS.
I had it all planned out. Sort of. Increase my mileage by approximately half a mile a week until two weeks before the race, by which time I’d be up to about thirteen miles (half a marathon), then a couple of shorter runs and lots of rest to conserve energy before the run. Simple.
After my mate USC (below) described how he’d done a similar thing to his knee and ended up under the surgeon’s knife, on crutches and completely out of sporting action for eight months, I went to the drop-in centre to get my knee checked out.
USC
I felt like a bit of a fraud as she prodded, stretched and massaged my knee, asking “Does this hurt? How about this? Or this?” while I sat shaking my head. Eventually the nurse told me I was suffering from knee-gah! (© The Fiver) having damaged my anterior cruciate ligaments and I should refrain from strenuous activity for six to eight weeks. “Definitely no rugby,” she said, bizarrely (I think she meant football). What about running? I asked. The same answer: Nothing for six weeks.
This is, not meaning to be crude, a bit of a shitter. I was really getting into the whole running lark, and although no more running this year (!) will set me back no end, I’m still determined to run the kilomathon. It just means I’ll have to work harder in 2010.
The crowning turd in the water pipe (© Blackadder Goes Forth) was that I went for a weigh-in at Boots today and found I’d GAINED three pounds. I’ve been running twice a week and playing 5-a-side and I’ve GAINED weight. I could very easily embark on a murderous rampage right now.
With exercise completely off the cards for THE REST OF THIS YEAR I have to discipline myself to eat very healthily. I think over the last few weeks I’ve used running as an excuse to not be particularly careful with what I eat. This must stop. I hate eating healthily but it looks like it’s back to making my own shitty, flavourless soups to take to work every day.
Anyway, I’m off out now to run down some motorcyclists in my car. AAAAGGGGGHHHHHH!
Gaz,
Running is shit. I say that as I’ve tried getting myself to a reasonable level with a mind to enter a local run but every time I get myself up to a comfortable 5 or 6 miles something goes wrong. Twisted knee. Sprained ankle which then developed into severe foot pain because I didn’t stop running having picked up the injury, so don’t try to go on another run til you’re sure it’s better. Swim. Aparently thats the only ‘exercise’ that is suitable when nursing an injury. I do not mean to try and sound like an expert because I certainly am not. I just tried and failed badly and you seem relatvely serious about the half marathon. I am gradually starting the running again but already little aches and pains are slowly developing.
Wilks x
Cycle fella, get on your bike (a bike, any bike)and rack the mileage up, then when it comes to the run, your fit, healthy, free off pain (coz cycling is non impact)& just run..!!
The crowd, the atmosphere, adrenalin, the thought of a pint, all these euphoric subliminal signs, messages & symbols will carry you through to the end, then throw your wanky Nikes in the bin, discard your wheels & do what you do best, loaf..!!
x
Mmmmmmm a bit of practice what you preach. Rob took a 200 mile round trip to pick up an ebay purchase of a push bike “but it was a bargin!”. A “project”!! Still in several hundred bits in the garage, if I was a gambler, i reckon my money would be safe if I bet that it won’t be road worthy till Chris Boardman competes in the olympics.I’m sure Rob will let you borrow it when it is done though Gadge – cos by then I’m sure the hovercraft will be in bits in the garage x
What a belting moustache. Makes him look deadly serious and almost hard. Bring back the handlebar Archie!